All of us have an instinct toward pleasure (sex, food etc). This is an inborn mental drive in all of us. But if we all were to follow these urges completely, community is endangered for there will be anarchy. For instance, it’s a known fact that men desire women sexually even when there’s no love involved. Men would actually sleep with any woman even without their consent if there were no restraints. So for the sake of civilization, we all have to give up some of our pleasures. Civilization in fact denies us much of the pleasure that a primitive man would be able to enjoy, that is, civilization represses us for the sake of civilization's stability.

Civilization is largely responsible for our misery; primitive man was much happier. The fact that we are repressed creates many of the psychological problems in society.

Humans commonly find ways to lessen the pain of withdrawal from the pleasure they really seek. Some find solace in alcohol or in a substitutive pleasure like art which may not give the gratification of sex, but it somehow lessens the pain of not getting what one wants. Real pleasure comes from the sudden satisfaction of repressed or withdrawn instincts. Think sex.

The idea behind civilization to some extent is ultimately a question of efficiency. Civilization more efficiently allows us ALL to get pleasure. Prior to civilization, what protection was there for keeping one's sexual partner? The strong could take any person available. Just club the poor sucker and take the woman away. So, civilization is supposed to protect the average person from that possibility and eventually increase our enjoyment through the miracle of modern technology (Viagra, sex toys, candles, u get the deal).

But men and women are still suffering as we are increasingly frustrated in our desires. Men are oppressed of their sexuality. Talk sex to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. Talk sex to a guy, it’s per minute. In the current society, men could not be true to his sexual desire for he will be branded as pervert. For women, she is not allowed to enjoy sex for the fear of being called a slut. The truth is, women enjoy sex just as much as we (men) do, if not more. They weren’t born with the ability to have multiple/longer orgasms for no reason. If a woman expresses her natural sex drive, other women will be intimidated. So they have to hate her and they call her a slut. To me personally, that’s a normal woman, at last.

I’m not saying we should pursue our primal instinct/desire regardless of the civilization. But men should be allowed to express his sexuality in a healthy way instead of repressing it. Never feel sorry for being a man. And women should stop using sex as a weapon or bargaining tool. Regard sex as the natural, pleasurable act that it is supposed to be.